Fine, Fine Literature

I just want to meet a man
I adore as much as I do
The smell of urinal cakes
In the summertime

I thought she had no legs
But turns out
They were just tucked in

So you think you can be my lover?
I haven’t told you
That I make robot noises
In public restrooms
So folks think I’m calibrating
Beep boop — beep bop

I’m sorry
That’s a beautiful sweater
(Give me your number)
I’ll get it dry cleaned for you
Is that 100% cashmere
Or are you just happy to see me?
Beep beep — boop bop

This must be what death feels like
— Sponsored by Nabisco!

Like a little Russian baby
Sleeping in her stroller
Beep bop —

As I can see from your tote
You like fine, fine literature!
——  — Boop zeep zoip